Pink Poogle Toy Forum

The official community of Pink Poogle Toy
Main Site
NeoDex
It is currently Fri Nov 22, 2024 1:45 pm

All times are UTC




Post new topic This topic is locked, you cannot edit posts or make further replies.  [ 3 posts ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: Essay
PostPosted: Mon Sep 05, 2005 5:32 pm 
Newbie
Newbie
User avatar

Posts: 9
Joined: Sun Sep 04, 2005 9:53 am
here's a short poem i wrote in about 3 minutes. critisisms and compliments welcome.
–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-–-
Essay
I have to write this essay and I don’t have time to waste
There aren’t any redoes so I really have to haste
This has to be my own work so I can’t just cut and paste
I have to do my very best but I don’t have any taste
I must finish in one minute at the very most
If I can’t do this I’m gonna be burnt toast
But I think I may have finished it and still have time to boast


Someday we'll look back at this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.

Very funny scotty, now beam down my clothes.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Sep 05, 2005 9:19 pm 
PPT Trainee
PPT Trainee
User avatar

Posts: 500
Joined: Fri Oct 22, 2004 1:02 pm
Location: The Internet
Heh, not too bad. The rhythem (sp?) seems kind of off though....but maybe that's just because I'm a percussionist.


Image


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Sep 06, 2005 3:39 am 
Beyond Godly
Beyond Godly

Posts: 3297
Joined: Fri Jun 04, 2004 3:43 am
Location: Set by me.
Don't think it;s just you, Cat, rhythm seems off to me. I quite like the subject matter, I -nearly- laughed out loud in the first few lines. The rpeating rhyme was used very well at first, and you managed to fit it all into contet and not cound forced. But then your rhyme changed and, IMO, it went to smurf after that.


Mas mothaionn tu fein mar rud eigin caite ar an dtra...
Image
Lig dom goideail an croi duit...


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic This topic is locked, you cannot edit posts or make further replies.  [ 3 posts ] 

All times are UTC


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 19 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group