Pink Poogle Toy Forum

Robert2100
The Eyes Of A Hunter
Wonderful. The 'the' could have been excluded, but I think it;s just fine as is. Fits very well with the picture and fairly well with the main text as well.

Twinkle
Beauty... or Beast?
I understand what you were attempting (I think) but it just doesn't fit with the signature. that's about all I can say.

Kitten Medli
Noble and brave.
On of the biggest problems I had with these subtexts is that they fit nicely with the text, but not with the picture. This is a prime eample. A lovely subtext, but it doesn't tie in with the picture.

Dawn2
Graceful Hunter
Don't know where this came from. Doesn't fit well with the picture or, OMO, with the text.

Ammer
The Fierce Hunter
A lovely subtext, but it doesn't tie in with the picture.

Eliminate
Dawn2
Twinkle

No no no no no no!! Me no wants to be judging this round *sniffle* They're all too good

First off let me congratulate everybody for making it this far. It's a very very tough decision to make so I'm going to be ripping the subtexts right down to their core and picking out tiny little things. Without doing this I'd never be able to choose

Sorry to those I eliminate, especially over things this trivial. This is by far the hardest decision I've had to make in this competition. Unlike a fair few of the rounds there has been no clear-cut person(s) that doesn't deserve to proceed compared to the standards set by others. You've all worked so hard for this and it's horrible to have to eliminate people over things that would hardly have been mentioned in previous rounds

It pains me to have to do this but...



Robert2100
"The Eyes Of A Hunter"

The phrasing of the words doesn't seem right here. It makes perfect grammatical sense, however I think the wording could have been better. At this level of competition I think that simply stating there is a picture of eyes isn't good enough either. If this was one of the earlier rounds I would have passed this easily but in the final five I think using something about actually looking with the eyes etc would have been better than stating there are eyes in the picture.

"Always Watching..."

Or something to that extent would have just gone that extra step to making the subtext perfect. I like the Hunting idea as well so using that theme in it would have been a nice addition as well "A true hunter is always watching" etc would have sounded better than simply mentioning the eyes. On the other hand you could have extended your current text a bit and described the eyes a bit more "A hunter's eyes never waver" or "A hunter's eyes never wary" would just take it up a notch.


Twinkle
Beauty... or Beast?

Perhaps this would work better with an animated signature that fades between a peaceful lion and an angry lion. However, we have no control over the signature itself so the subtext has to be the one that is altered to suit

The main problem with your subtext is the beast section doesn't relate to the almost docile lion. Whilst one could argue the Lion is biding his time as he watches over the wilderness looking for prey it would take a very lengthy discussion to get me to think the beast section relates perfectly with the signature

Beast section aside a fade could be used rather effectively to fade the second half of the text in and out.

If you were allowed to change one section of the signature to fit your subtext having the lion fade in and out in two different poses or having half the lion's face in a snarl and the other in the current pose would make the subtext and signature go together perfectly...however, you can't unfortunately. In future relate the text to the context of the signature


Kitten Medli
Noble and brave.

I found this the hardest one to judge. I couldn't decide whether the Lion in the picture seemed Noble and Brave enough to make special mention of it in the subtext

In the end I decided it wasn't really that suiting. If the picture had been of a cliched "Lion King styled standing on a rock roaring" Lion then I would have a problem with this signature

Whilst many adjectives used to describe Lions are things like 'Noble', 'Brave', 'Proud', 'Fierce' etc you really need to be describing the Lion's pose and body language more than the lion itself

It does relate to the Main Text however which I suppose shoiuld count for something, but at this standard I think that relating to the central figure or all features of the signature is what you should be aiming to do.

Dawn2
Graceful Hunter

The Lion in the picture doesn't seem to be hunting in my opinion. One could argue that he's watching from his rock surveying the area for prey but to me it seems the Lion is relaxing and enjoying itself (Whilst still alert however)

Perhaps this would suit better with a picture of a leaping Lion hunting an animal but a head-shot doesn't seem to suit the subtext

While writing this it occured to me that it does relate to the main text "Lion" but at a stage like this I think it's more important to either relate it to more than one feature or the central feature/image. You've related it to lion's in general but not to the lion in this context

On the flipside of this there was a good point made about the lion looking prepared to strike if needed. But I disagree with the Graceful comment right now...a better adjective would have solved this problem

Ammer
The Fierce Hunter

Likewise your subtext doesn't really suit the central image due to the nature of the lion in the signature. However I can see the connection of a Fierce Hunter and the eyes in the picture a lot more clearly.

The word "the" possibly wasn't needed here. "Fierce Hunter" or "Hunting Fiercely" would suffice. However, if you were to have done that I probably would have suggested using the word "The" in front

I think you're first subtext would be much better than this one, especially with a few tweaks.

Refer to Dawn2's judging for some more pointers


Eliminate *sob sob* : Twinkle, Dawn2

i'm really sorry AE and all the competitors, i'm not gonna be able to judge this round. i'm feeling really really ill and can hardly keep my eyes open, i've just popped on to tell you all this, now i'm going back to bed. sorry again.

Eh, final five is good enough for me. Bye, guys, it's been fun.

It's fine, I hope you get better

(Pardon me for double posting, and also, sorry for such a delay. I got kind of sick last night too >_<)

Robert2100 It's good, and it really fits in with how the picture is focused on the eyes. Of course, hunter fits in with how it shows a lion. I think the "the" you could do without, but otherwise, pretty good. Good job!

Twinkle I see how the "beast" fits in with the story, but I just don't see how the "beauty" part fits in with the picture on the signature. I can see the direction you were going at, but I think you could have done better.

Kitten Medli I like the subtext, I could see it going on the signature - it really ties in with the main text, Lion, but even though the picture shows a lion...it focuses more on one section of the lion, the eyes, so while keeping your current subtext, but tying in the eyes with it, can make it better, I think.

Dawn2 I could just repeat what I said for Medli...your subtext does describe the main text, and the animal shown on the picture, but the picture does focus more on one part - the eyes. Instead of showing maybe the whole body, the picture does show the eyes only, so adding something to your subtext that ties in with the lion's eyes can definitely make your subtext better, I think.

Ammer I could see why you'd use this subtext, but still, it doesn't tie in that great with the picture. I can see how the eyes could go with the subtext, but the eyes don't look particularly fierce, or angry etc. Actually, I think I like your first subtext better, as it fits in with the eyes better, and I really feel that you don't have to look angry to have a deadly stare.

Eliminate: Twinkle, Kitten Medli

(I'll post the next round up later on today.)

Aww I got so far! Well goodbye everyone and good luck! You all deserve it!!

Aww Bye Twinkle and Dawn. Congrats on making it so far. Well looks like it is Meldi, Ammer and I...how I made it this far is beyond me Well good luck to you two!