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I'm not just "leaving"...I'm going to camp.

Tue Jun 27, 2006 2:45 pm

There's waaay too many of those topics with the title that says "I'm leaving" and then the post tells about the vacation...I'm guessing they're supposed to scare us, but of course the announcement *points up* would get rid of that possibility.

Anyway. I'm going to camp on June 29. That's the day after tomorrow. (Advance notice is always good.) I'm coming back August 20. That's the day after the day after the day after the day after the day after...oh, forget it.

Tue Jun 27, 2006 4:51 pm

Have fun! I've always wanted to go to camp. :) What kind of camp is it?

Tue Jun 27, 2006 5:01 pm

I've always wondered what people do at "camp" Is there a british well-known alternative?

Tue Jun 27, 2006 5:49 pm

Think of it as going on holiday someplace in the middle of the woods in a cabin with a bunch of other people your age who, as you will discover, are as frequently gassy/itchy/irritable as you.

"Campers," as they are called, swear to themselves every night that if bunkmate B has one more coughing fit they'll kill him/her in his/her sleep without a second thought.

Campers will also alternately hate their cabin's staff member and swoon over his/her cuteness. Hatred usually comes in the mornings when the staff member knocks on the door to wake everyone up around 6:30. The swooning happens around 2:00 in the morning when, as we all know, everything is funny and everyone is attractive.

At least one person will break a leg, arm, collarbone, or all three. Some enterprizing young man might actually run an oddsmaking operation betting on specific people. Bet on the person in the bunk under you, so that if you win you can afford to buy him/her some nice flowers.

At least one person will get mauled by a bear. This is never the person who also breaks all his or her limbs. It is, however, usually the person who covers himself/herself in peanut butter or honey and goes wandering into the woods. If there are no bears around, the mauling will be done to the person wearing a steak necklace and will be done by some sort of large cat.

At least one person will attempt to sneak up on a deer by putting his or her hands up to his or her head with fingers splayed and thumbs in the ears, saying, "Lookeee! I'm a deer! I'm your friend!" Chances are about 50/50 that this person takes a back hoof to the face.

At least one person will agree to go out on a snipe hunt. For the benefit of readers: Snipes aren't real. Don't go on one, because your guide will just leave you in the middle of the woods when you aren't looking, because it's really funny when someone with no outdoors experience is marooned in the middle of a forest 8 hours from civilization. Apparently.

At least one person will confess that he/she can't swim once his/her rowboat reaches the middle of the lake and springs a leak. At least one person who goes out on the rescue will be doing so merely to impress a girl.

At least one person will discover the opposite sex for the first time, and become really annoying. This is the person most likely to have a steak tied around his/her or have peanut butter/honey smeared on him her before being carried into the woods.

As for activities, campers do things like hiking (and get attacked by ticks), swimming or canoeing (and get attacked by mosquitos and killer carp), shooting sports (someone ALWAYS does the "arrow through the head" gag) and arts and crafts. Things like leatherworking, metalworking, and woodworking are all pretty common, as are things like needle punctures, blunt-force trauma, and missing digits. Singing is a frequent mealtime activity - it's so gooey and cheesy it makes the teenagers nauseous, thereby ruining their appetites and keeping food costs down.

Upon the last day, however, all of the campers will weep uncontrollably and promise to write one another and keep in touch (note: they rarely do). Then they tell their parents that it was perfect and that it was the greatest time ever and ohmygosh can I go again next year?

Skip back up to paragraph one. Repeat.

Tue Jun 27, 2006 10:35 pm

Shapu... you're my hero...

Have fun, Tyma. <3

Tue Jun 27, 2006 11:12 pm

Yes, hope you have a great time Tyma... and that you'll maybe get to observe some of Shapu's camp predictions (they sound very entertaining) ;)

Wed Jun 28, 2006 12:52 am

:P My camp's not like that. It's not wilderness. I'll describe it as concisely as I can...I've been known to babble about it for twenty pages on Word. :P

There's cabin-ish-thingies with bunk beds, a bathroom area, and some floor space. I think there's an average of ten campers and thirteen counselors per bunk, leaving one bed empty in case the bunk's not average. We do activities...there's a lot of different stuff. Counselors are not the ones the campers get crushes on. :D Three meals (per day)...breakfast, lunch, dinner...plus snacks every two periods. Meals are in a dining hall, and after everyone's done eating, there's a sequence of sentence fragments that everyone yells out, and then announcements. There's plays. Camp is fun. Yayness and all that. Mmkay, going to bed. Byebye.

Wed Jun 28, 2006 12:53 am

Bangel wrote:Shapu... you're my hero...

Have fun, Tyma. <3


Hey, I just tell it like it is.

Have a good time, T. Despite all the doom and gloom that spouts from my pie-hole, the odds are definitely in your favor that you won't be involved in any of it.

So bring a camera.

Wed Jun 28, 2006 1:33 am

*applauds Shapu*

That was brilliant.

Anyway, have fun, Tyma! We'll all miss you :)
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