Rules For Better Writing
Wed Oct 11, 2006 12:04 am
-Verbs has to agree with their subjects.
-Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
-And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
-It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
-Avoid clichés like the plague (they're old hat).
-Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
-Be more or less specific.
-Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
-Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
-No sentence fragments.
-Contractions aren't necessary and shouldn't be used.
-Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
-Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it is highly superfluous.
-One should NEVER generalize.
-Comparisons are as bad as clichés.
-Don't use no double negatives.
-Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
-One word sentences? Eliminate.
-Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
-The passive voice is to be ignored.
-Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however should be enclosed in commas.
-Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
-Kill all exclamation points!!!
-Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
-Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earthshaking ideas.
-Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed.
-Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."
-If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
-Puns are for children, not for groan readers.
-Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
-Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
-Who needs rhetorical questions?
-Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
-Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
-And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
-It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
-Avoid clichés like the plague (they're old hat).
-Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
-Be more or less specific.
-Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
-Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
-No sentence fragments.
-Contractions aren't necessary and shouldn't be used.
-Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
-Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it is highly superfluous.
-One should NEVER generalize.
-Comparisons are as bad as clichés.
-Don't use no double negatives.
-Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
-One word sentences? Eliminate.
-Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
-The passive voice is to be ignored.
-Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however should be enclosed in commas.
-Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
-Kill all exclamation points!!!
-Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
-Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earthshaking ideas.
-Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed.
-Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."
-If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
-Puns are for children, not for groan readers.
-Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
-Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
-Who needs rhetorical questions?
-Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
Wed Oct 11, 2006 3:08 am
I needs to show this to my English teacher.
Thu Oct 12, 2006 4:20 pm
Rofl, rofl, and more rofl.
That's genius xDD
That's genius xDD
Thu Oct 12, 2006 8:42 pm
Wait, who takes offense to comparisons, analogies and quotations? *boggle*
(It was priceless to watch my ninth-grade English teacher, a stickler if ever there was one, twist the sentence "He enjoyed being read to" so that it didn't end in a preposition.)
(It was priceless to watch my ninth-grade English teacher, a stickler if ever there was one, twist the sentence "He enjoyed being read to" so that it didn't end in a preposition.)
Fri Oct 13, 2006 4:37 am
Hil-coconut-arious!
I like the "Be more or less specific" one
I like the "Be more or less specific" one
Fri Oct 13, 2006 11:29 pm
that was great. I gota show my government (who was my 8th grade english teacher and a big stickler) these XD XD XD