Wed Oct 19, 2005 1:20 am
Yeah, I feel the same way sometimes. 
But I don't PM either, so that's my problem.
But I don't PM either, so that's my problem.
Wed Oct 19, 2005 2:24 am
*shrug*
I started by IMing people - I think the first person I contacted off PPT was Jasujo. We stopped talking, but then a few months later started again.
It's a two-way street, you have to make the effort just as much as someone else.
You mentioned something about how SL knew things about others. The reason he created that thread about me getting accepted into the place I want to go to is because we talk via IM a lot. We're both from Melbourne, and so we have a lot of common ground, especially with schooling, exams, etc.
I started by IMing people - I think the first person I contacted off PPT was Jasujo. We stopped talking, but then a few months later started again.
It's a two-way street, you have to make the effort just as much as someone else.
You mentioned something about how SL knew things about others. The reason he created that thread about me getting accepted into the place I want to go to is because we talk via IM a lot. We're both from Melbourne, and so we have a lot of common ground, especially with schooling, exams, etc.
Wed Oct 19, 2005 2:26 am
I can't say I feel the same way, but you have to remember a lot of people are really close friends here. Heck, Puck and I often say things no one has any idea about because we're close friends IRL.
I've got a lot of friends here, but I didn't just find them. I've RPed with FM and Anubis for a long time, DM and I used to PM each other, stuff like that.
Also, a lot of us have LJ's and read our friends journals. Thats how we keep up with each other.
You've just got to reach out and talk with people. Get more involved! PM, talk more often, stuff like that, like Fidds said.
Heck, I didn't know about Werepup getting married because I don't know her to well. But oh, well. I still have friends.
I've got a lot of friends here, but I didn't just find them. I've RPed with FM and Anubis for a long time, DM and I used to PM each other, stuff like that.
Also, a lot of us have LJ's and read our friends journals. Thats how we keep up with each other.
You've just got to reach out and talk with people. Get more involved! PM, talk more often, stuff like that, like Fidds said.
Heck, I didn't know about Werepup getting married because I don't know her to well. But oh, well. I still have friends.
Wed Oct 19, 2005 2:56 am
I learn people birthdays in the birthday thread that shows up every now and then. Simple really.
Wed Oct 19, 2005 3:01 am
You can't expect everyone to suddenly start talking to you because you post on the forums. :/ Like everyone else, I made friends by IMing people. Just take the initiative. My only suggestion is that when IMing someone, don't just IM them to say hi.. have something specific to say, like a comment about something they posted, or a common interest. You can get an actual conversation off of something like that that progresses much further than "Hi, how're you".
Wed Oct 19, 2005 3:21 am
Usually just luck informs most of us of birthdays and other events
The people I IM IRL I know quite well of birthdates and other such things, and sometimes you simply find out in advance by a chain of events. Don't worry, most of us are in the dark most of the time!
The people I IM IRL I know quite well of birthdates and other such things, and sometimes you simply find out in advance by a chain of events. Don't worry, most of us are in the dark most of the time!
Wed Oct 19, 2005 3:43 am
Ginger, you are probably not going to believe this, but I was a lot like you when I was your age. Shy and always feeling like I never fit in. I hated going to parties because I was just too darned afraid of saying the wrong thing or making a fool out of myself. And, I felt so alone.
And, once I graduated college, I was the same way at my first job. Walking around, too afraid to talk to anyone. And, one day, this sweet dear lady who sat next to me gave me "a' talking to." Her words. About how people thought that I was snobby and felt I was better than the rest of them. And, I just about died. Because I felt like everyone of them just had to be better than me and would laugh at me when they realized that.
But, that talk did it for me. I took it upon myself to stop caring what people thought about me and just started having fun. And opened myself up to people. It was hard. And, I did it all by myself. But, I forced myself to start making the first move. Rather than waiting for someone else to do it. So, I started looking people in the eye and saying hi first. And walking up to my co-workers at lunch and joining them. Rather than hiding away in a corner with my nose in a book.
And sure I was nervous and there were times when I looked like a total idiot. Still are times when I look like a total idiot.
But, I just decided that they were going to see me the way I really was. And if they didn't like me, well there were plenty of other people in the world who might.
And, I realized something even more important: that there were a lot of people out there who were like I used to be--afraid to make the first move. And were waiting for someone like me to come along and say hi and smile at them. Break the ice and make them feel like part of the group. Just like that sweet lady who sat next to me did.
And, I have been that way ever since. I try to smile at everyone I encounter. A geniune smile, too. And, ask my daughter (who gets so embarassed about it), I can walk up to a complete stranger, find something in common and talk their ear off. And, I really don't care what anyone thinks of me. This is me. Take it or leave it.
If you feel confident about yourself and genuine about your feelings, it doesn't really matter how many friends you have or if you are part of "the group." Because not everyone is going to like you. That is a given. And some people are going to rub you the wrong way and you are not going to like them. But, some people might just like you the way you are and connect with you.
But you won't ever know that if you don't make the first move and attempt to connect with them. Or respond to them if they have made the first move. And, maybe you have to fall on your face a few times before you find those people that you feel comfortable with. And, it doesn't happen overnight. You have to keep at it. Keep talking to the person. Keep connecting. Even when it seems hard. Or you are nervous. Or you need to say something to them that isn't so kind.
Even though I have been here 2-1/2 years, I don't have that many close friends on PPT that I talk to via IM or PMs. But, just about everyone here knows me. I have gone out of my way to make people know who I am. And, not running around saying kiss, kiss and fake stuff like that. But, posting ideas, feelings, opinions that I feel strongly about. Giving support or helpful advice when it is needed. A shoulder to cry on. Sometimes, providing a different way to look at a situation. Even constructive criticism.
I became friends with one of my best friends here on PPT after we both suffered major losses on Neopets after glitches hit us. We literally cried together via PMs. And, 2 years later, he is still one of my best online friends. We found something in common and just connected. And if you looked at the two of us, we are as different as night and day. But, found so much in common despite our differences.
And, not everyone agrees with all of the stuff I say. Thank goodness. And, my guess is that some people might not even be able to stand me and a few have even gotten into fights with me (back in the good old days). But, hey, this is me. Take it or leave it. I will not die if someone decides to dislike me. Because I know that there are others who feel different. And more people are out there to meet.
And, Ginger, I really feel for you because I have walked miles in those shoes of yours. I know how hard it is. But, if you want to be part of a group, you have to make yourself part of that group. You have to do it. Not wait for any of us to do it for you.
So, relax, take a deep breath and just do it. Deep down inside you know you can.
And, once I graduated college, I was the same way at my first job. Walking around, too afraid to talk to anyone. And, one day, this sweet dear lady who sat next to me gave me "a' talking to." Her words. About how people thought that I was snobby and felt I was better than the rest of them. And, I just about died. Because I felt like everyone of them just had to be better than me and would laugh at me when they realized that.
But, that talk did it for me. I took it upon myself to stop caring what people thought about me and just started having fun. And opened myself up to people. It was hard. And, I did it all by myself. But, I forced myself to start making the first move. Rather than waiting for someone else to do it. So, I started looking people in the eye and saying hi first. And walking up to my co-workers at lunch and joining them. Rather than hiding away in a corner with my nose in a book.
And sure I was nervous and there were times when I looked like a total idiot. Still are times when I look like a total idiot.
But, I just decided that they were going to see me the way I really was. And if they didn't like me, well there were plenty of other people in the world who might.
And, I realized something even more important: that there were a lot of people out there who were like I used to be--afraid to make the first move. And were waiting for someone like me to come along and say hi and smile at them. Break the ice and make them feel like part of the group. Just like that sweet lady who sat next to me did.
And, I have been that way ever since. I try to smile at everyone I encounter. A geniune smile, too. And, ask my daughter (who gets so embarassed about it), I can walk up to a complete stranger, find something in common and talk their ear off. And, I really don't care what anyone thinks of me. This is me. Take it or leave it.
If you feel confident about yourself and genuine about your feelings, it doesn't really matter how many friends you have or if you are part of "the group." Because not everyone is going to like you. That is a given. And some people are going to rub you the wrong way and you are not going to like them. But, some people might just like you the way you are and connect with you.
But you won't ever know that if you don't make the first move and attempt to connect with them. Or respond to them if they have made the first move. And, maybe you have to fall on your face a few times before you find those people that you feel comfortable with. And, it doesn't happen overnight. You have to keep at it. Keep talking to the person. Keep connecting. Even when it seems hard. Or you are nervous. Or you need to say something to them that isn't so kind.
Even though I have been here 2-1/2 years, I don't have that many close friends on PPT that I talk to via IM or PMs. But, just about everyone here knows me. I have gone out of my way to make people know who I am. And, not running around saying kiss, kiss and fake stuff like that. But, posting ideas, feelings, opinions that I feel strongly about. Giving support or helpful advice when it is needed. A shoulder to cry on. Sometimes, providing a different way to look at a situation. Even constructive criticism.
I became friends with one of my best friends here on PPT after we both suffered major losses on Neopets after glitches hit us. We literally cried together via PMs. And, 2 years later, he is still one of my best online friends. We found something in common and just connected. And if you looked at the two of us, we are as different as night and day. But, found so much in common despite our differences.
And, not everyone agrees with all of the stuff I say. Thank goodness. And, my guess is that some people might not even be able to stand me and a few have even gotten into fights with me (back in the good old days). But, hey, this is me. Take it or leave it. I will not die if someone decides to dislike me. Because I know that there are others who feel different. And more people are out there to meet.
And, Ginger, I really feel for you because I have walked miles in those shoes of yours. I know how hard it is. But, if you want to be part of a group, you have to make yourself part of that group. You have to do it. Not wait for any of us to do it for you.
So, relax, take a deep breath and just do it. Deep down inside you know you can.
Wed Oct 19, 2005 3:59 am
Morningstar wrote:And, my guess is that some people might not even be able to stand me
Got that right.
My god, someone get this weirdo away from me and any thread i'm around. And for good measure, shove some gruel cookies down her throat.
Anywho. Ginger there's been a lot of good advice on this thread (not just from me either)... notice all the people... reaching out to you...
Wed Oct 19, 2005 4:33 am
ahoteinrun wrote:Morningstar wrote:And, my guess is that some people might not even be able to stand me
Got that right.
My god, someone get this weirdo away from me and any thread i'm around. And for good measure, shove some gruel cookies down her throat.
Anywho. Ginger there's been a lot of good advice on this thread (not just from me either)... notice all the people... reaching out to you...
*grabs Inrun so hard in a bear hug you can hear the snap of a collarbone*
Aww, Inrun, you brought gruel cookies? For me? Ain't she just the sweetest friend. And she just let's me babble on and on, though a few times she's tried to slap me! Deservedly so, I will admit.
And, Ginger, she is right. You need to take notice.
Wed Oct 19, 2005 5:03 am
I'm sorry and I do not usually reply to these threads like this, but I do not have very much sympathy for you. You posted an extremely similar thread back in March here:
http://www.pinkpt.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=15471
Have you followed the suggestions people posted there? Have you joined rps, joined Divas, PM'd people, answered PMs, IM'd people, etc. etc.? You've started thread after thread in Misc. Disc. (which there is absolutely nothing wrong with) and you get many responses to each one, yet you still complain that you don't know anyone. Well, gee, I'm sure that doesn't hurt anyone's feelings.
These members have taken their time to reply to your threads and posts and stuff and yet you are still going on about how you are all alone on a forum of over 5,000 people.
Instead of posting anymore of these "no one knows me" threads in the future, why don't you try to know other people. It's a two way street. If you want a friend, you have to be a friend. It takes time and effort. Put yourself into it and I'm sure you'll find what you're looking for. I have and I treasure my friends dearly and they each know.
http://www.pinkpt.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=15471
Have you followed the suggestions people posted there? Have you joined rps, joined Divas, PM'd people, answered PMs, IM'd people, etc. etc.? You've started thread after thread in Misc. Disc. (which there is absolutely nothing wrong with) and you get many responses to each one, yet you still complain that you don't know anyone. Well, gee, I'm sure that doesn't hurt anyone's feelings.
These members have taken their time to reply to your threads and posts and stuff and yet you are still going on about how you are all alone on a forum of over 5,000 people.
Instead of posting anymore of these "no one knows me" threads in the future, why don't you try to know other people. It's a two way street. If you want a friend, you have to be a friend. It takes time and effort. Put yourself into it and I'm sure you'll find what you're looking for. I have and I treasure my friends dearly and they each know.
Wed Oct 19, 2005 6:18 am
Alex wrote:*shrug*
I started by IMing people - I think the first person I contacted off PPT was Jasujo. We stopped talking, but then a few months later started again.
It's a two-way street, you have to make the effort just as much as someone else.
You mentioned something about how SL knew things about others. The reason he created that thread about me getting accepted into the place I want to go to is because we talk via IM a lot. We're both from Melbourne, and so we have a lot of common ground, especially with schooling, exams, etc.
Hehe I know a lot about Alex because I live outside her house in the garbage bin. Now if I can only get Alex to stop throwing her waste in there. I do NOT like apple cores thrown into my kettle.
Wed Oct 19, 2005 8:00 am
Try living in her laundry basket, I assure you it's far worse.
Wed Oct 19, 2005 8:35 am
I get that feeling of not knowing people all the time, but yeah, thats a good idea that everyone is saying. PM people...
... I should PM people, but I am a bit shy
oh, by the way, PPT is closing down. Hope you know that
... I should PM people, but I am a bit shy
oh, by the way, PPT is closing down. Hope you know that
Wed Oct 19, 2005 9:13 am
It is?! Why wasn't I informed???
Wed Oct 19, 2005 11:03 am
*terrible cheezy intro jimgle™*
Do you lack social skills? Have seriously bad personal hygiene? Spit when you talk and use curse words words as if they were punctuation? Then you probably dont have many friends.
CHANGE ALL THAT RIGHT NOW!!
I can show you how. Grabbing ultimate power and becoming a forum Administrator might not make people like you, but golly gosh darnit you can bet your last cumquat that they'll listen to what you say and reply to it in a sycophantic manner!!
To change your life, just go to http://www.ImaloserandIwishIwasJim.com and give me all your cash via paypal. It probably wont work, but if enough of you do it, I wont just be popular anymore: I'll be RICH and popular! Visit today!!
--------------
Talk to people. They'll talk back.
Except me, but Im just like that.
Do you lack social skills? Have seriously bad personal hygiene? Spit when you talk and use curse words words as if they were punctuation? Then you probably dont have many friends.
CHANGE ALL THAT RIGHT NOW!!
I can show you how. Grabbing ultimate power and becoming a forum Administrator might not make people like you, but golly gosh darnit you can bet your last cumquat that they'll listen to what you say and reply to it in a sycophantic manner!!
To change your life, just go to http://www.ImaloserandIwishIwasJim.com and give me all your cash via paypal. It probably wont work, but if enough of you do it, I wont just be popular anymore: I'll be RICH and popular! Visit today!!
--------------
Talk to people. They'll talk back.
Except me, but Im just like that.