doctor doctor jokes

[hey123]

doctor doctor i eat a role of film:
oh lets hope nothnig delapes

[(*Dranzer*)]

Delapes? And I believe you meant Roll? As soon as you clariffy, I shall most certaintly laugh.

[shapu]

Should be "develops," I think.

"Doctor, it hurts when I do this..."
"Don't do that."

"Doctor, it hurts when I touch here, and here, and here..."
"You have a broken finger."

"Doctor, the invisible man is here for his checkup."
"Tell him I can't see him now."

"Doctor, I think I have a split personality."
"Sit there and there."

"Miss, you're going to have to get down to your underwear for this part of the examination."
"Doctor, I can't undress in front of you!"
"That's OK, I'll turn out the lights."
"Where should I put my clothes?"
"Over on the chair, on top of mine."

"Cover your left eye, and read as much as you can. Good. Now the right. Alright, now both."
"Now I can't see anything!"

"Doctor, I broke my arm in two places!"
"Stay away from those places."

"Mr. Thomas, I'm afraid you don't have very long to live."
"Oh, that's terrible. How long do I have?"
"Ten."
"Ten what? Ten days? Ten months?"
"Nine."

"My tongue tingles when I touch it to a walnut that's been dipped in sherry and wrapped in saran wrap. What's wrong with me?"
"You need better hobbies."