If Cars were like Computers
Mon Jul 12, 2004 12:20 am
1. For no resason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally, your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car,restart it,and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason, you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Only one person at a time could use the car unless you bought 'CarNT,' but then you would have to buy more seats.
6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive-but would run on only five percent of the roads.
7. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single 'Genral Protection Fault' warning light.
8. New seats would force everyone to have the same sized butt.
9. The airbag system would ask 'Are you sure?' before deploying.
10. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they neither need nor want them. Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to diminsh by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the Justice Department.
12.Every time GM intorduced a new car, car buyers would have to learn to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
13. You'd have to press the 'Start' button to turn the engine off.
2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally, your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car,restart it,and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason, you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Only one person at a time could use the car unless you bought 'CarNT,' but then you would have to buy more seats.
6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive-but would run on only five percent of the roads.
7. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single 'Genral Protection Fault' warning light.
8. New seats would force everyone to have the same sized butt.
9. The airbag system would ask 'Are you sure?' before deploying.
10. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they neither need nor want them. Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to diminsh by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the Justice Department.
12.Every time GM intorduced a new car, car buyers would have to learn to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
13. You'd have to press the 'Start' button to turn the engine off.
Mon Jul 12, 2004 2:03 am
xD..Those are funny!
Mon Jul 12, 2004 2:12 am
MUHAAA! Those are so funny! Good job! 
Wed Jul 14, 2004 3:54 am
I'd hate it if the first one happened to me. 
Funny!
Funny!
Wed Jul 14, 2004 9:39 am
2, 5, 7, 9 and 13 made me go 
Wed Jul 14, 2004 10:57 am
Its sooo true! Thanks for that, it made me laugh!
Wed Jul 14, 2004 1:18 pm
haha... read this 1 b4...
Wed Jul 14, 2004 1:50 pm
Oh my gosh.. That was waaaay too good! I must save a copy for whenever I'm angry cos my computer froze. xD Sooo good.
That was waaaay too good! I must save a copy for whenever I'm angry cos my computer froze. xD Sooo good.
Wed Jul 14, 2004 3:29 pm
Heh, that was pretty funny, gonna show that to my dad see if it gets a laugh out of him.
Wed Jul 14, 2004 4:46 pm
The thing is, all those are true. Except I don't get the one about butts and GM.
Thu Jul 15, 2004 9:01 am
10. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
That's the best one!
Thu Jul 15, 2004 11:28 am
tehehehe, so true! ah, thats why i haven't bothered to learn to drive, can you imagine doing those on a freeway?
can you imagine doing those on a freeway?
Thu Jul 15, 2004 3:42 pm
Kevco wrote:The thing is, all those are true. Except I don't get the one about butts and GM.
I understand the butts one, though I can't explain it well. The thing with GM is like Microsoft and many of their applications. If you try removing something like Interent Explorer your computer will be messed up for awhile.
Thu Jul 15, 2004 4:12 pm
lol those are pretty funny except the 1 about macs.. (no offense to ppl who use macs but they're soo simple and stupid.. you can't program at all)
Thu Jul 15, 2004 5:15 pm
haha, those were hilarious!
Whenever I get made at the car, like when the door refuses to shut, I can just be glad it's not like a computer, then it doesn't seem that bad!
Whenever I get made at the car, like when the door refuses to shut, I can just be glad it's not like a computer, then it doesn't seem that bad!