Before I post, I'll let ye know I NEVER thought I'd post on this board, because as a rule I hate sports. So... um... yeh.
All right, I was playing Kickball in gym and as I was lying on the ground with what felt like a concussion and everyone yelling at me that I should have caught the ball so we could win the game, and my sadistic gym teacher smirking at me and writing down what I was sure was a "D" on her clipboard, I realised that there are some sports that just go against a person's instincts.
I have battle instincts. They make sense to me. Ok, picture this: (kickball scenario)
A large, injurious four-square ball is soaring towards your face at up to ninety-three miles per hour! Do you:
a. Duck!
b. Block it with your arm!
c. Attempt to catch it!
Battle instincts would give a fight-or-flight response. A flight response would be to duck. A fight response would be to block it.
I just don't understand the people who choose c. It doesn't make sense to me.
Ok, assuming you've caught it, do you:
D. Drop it!
E. Throw it at your enemy (opposite team)!
F. Throw it at your friend (your team)!
Flight is D, E is fight, and F is.... sports.
I really don't get this. I picture lots of situations in a Pelennor context, and I'm just picturing Eomer catching an arrow and shooting it at Theoden. (Say... reminds me of Catch And Fire from The Swan Princess XP) Doesn't make sense to me.
Here's a scenario of the result of too much kickball:
Huge battle between Spaniards and... uh... someone else with wonky armor rages!
Gasp! It's a cannonball headed towards the Spaniards!
Spaniard: I've got it! I've got it!
*dies*
Dude doing memorial speech: "He was strong in life. And he played kickball too much."
Whereas Dodgeball... it makes sense to me. You *dodge* the injurious object which soars towards your head at up to ninety-three miles per hour! You *throw* the ones you find on the ground towards your enemy! Heck, in some versions there's even No Man's Land!
So I hereby deem Dodgeball the Third Marshall of sports.
Eomer: ??? But-- I'm the Third Marshall!
Uh, of Rohan, yeah.
(Swordfighting is the king. I have not yet chosen a Theodred-type.)
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