Ginger Harp Seal Pup wrote:
Also, I know deep down that there's something very wrong with me, and I've tried to get help but there are so many factors pushing me back.
Ginger, do you feel comfortable discussing these factors? I've spoken to a therapist in the past, and I've also had a reluctance to make that first call, so I kind of know where you're coming from.
Ginger Harp Seal Pup wrote:
Also, regarding what happened in the past when I saw a psychiatrist last year (she concluded there was nothing wrong with me) I'm worried the same thing is going to happen again and all this trouble I've gone to about getting help has all been in vain.
Ginger, please look for another psychiatrist or a therapist. A psychiatrist's job is not always just to find out whether there's something "wrong" with you (although sometimes they need to make diagnoses). Their job is also to help you achieve your goals, and obviously you do have goals you want to achieve.
You may need to speak to more than one before you find somebody you are comfortable with. Please do NOT give up! I've spoken to therapists about issues regarding depression. It is
definitely worth it, if you can find the right therapist for you.
Ginger Harp Seal Pup wrote:
Similar things have happened and they all get me to thinking that I'm not meant to get help. It feels like more than just co-incidence.
Ginger, please do
not believe this. It is a possibility you're reading to much into things because you are reluctant to speak to a doctor.