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 Post subject: stuck between a rock and a rock and a hard place...
PostPosted: Sun Aug 28, 2005 8:41 pm 
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ugh im confused.. ok, so i like my gurlfriend right, then she dumps me last year so her friend can go out with me. Now, i didnt quite like her friend last year, but now i thnk im starting to like her, and my gurlfriend(the one that dumped me so her friend could go out with me got back with me after like a week) thinks her friend is so much better then her at everything like siging and dancing (which my gurlfriend is actually better at) and ing (dunno why this is so important...) and such.. but anyway i think im starting to like her friend and i dont want to break up with my current gurlfriend cuz then she'll be mad and be like " so you did like her!!!" and "I knew it!! You never liked me!!!!" and "She's perfect, and you know it!".... yea... and the friend still likes me... so what shoudl i do.?

*sigh* well, no one wants to help me... typical...

StarEdit: No double posting, please. :)


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 11:09 pm 
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So you're girlfriend dumped you for a week to get together with her best friend? Why would she do that, wouldn't she think that sparks may fly between the two of you and even if you and your girlfriend got back together (Which happened), you'd still have some feelings towards her best friend? I would advise you to sit down and talk to your girlfriend and tell you that you have started to have feelings for her best friend and the best thing for you guys to do is break up. Tell her that you didn't like her best friend all along but when she "broke up" with you and let you date her best friend (Opening up a lot of doors) that feelings were formed.

Your girlfriend must realise that if you and her best friend date, it's primarily her fault for letting you two date in the first place.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 11:35 pm 
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Uhm... Im more confused than you. Your girlfriend broke up with you with the intention that you - her boyfriend - should date her best friend? Why on earth would she give you up willing to her bestfriend when she still wants you? Did I understand that right? And why werent you more angry that they were passing you around like a hot potato?


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 11:40 pm 
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.neko. wrote:
Uhm... Im more confused than you. Your friend broke up with you with the intention that you - her boyfriend - should date her best friend? Why on earth would she give you up willing to her bestfriend when she still wants you? Did I understand that right? And why werent you more angry that they were passing you around like a hot potato?
ok, i didnt really know what they were doing untill early this year when i asked why she kept on braking up with me and she said that.. and she thot that i would get angry so she didnt tell me untill i said i dont get angry that easy.. and she's just nice like that because her friend liked me and she was willing to give up the chance for her friend...


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 11:42 pm 
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I read it.

I read the whole thing.

I wanted to stop.

I even wrote a witty post for how I wanted to read the whole thing but stopped at "ok so i like my gurlfriend right" but I couldn't do that. That would've been insensitive and cruel.

But I read it. I did the right thing. Today is about giving!

----

Have you ever gone to a brithday party as a kid and you didn't really know the child. Its like you were in his class even though they sat in the back row and made frog noises while you were in the front learning how to read. Or they went to pre-school with your best friend then moved away but recently moved back and the mom is trying to get him to make friends so she invites anyone indirectly connected through that pre-school. Anyways, you go to the party and its kind of low energy, at least for a grade 2 party. Not a lot of screaming, just sitting around, someone slaps in a Disney movie and you zone out. You give the kid the present your mom bought. Then it comes time to eat and instead of normal party food like pizza or hot dogs, mom brings out something really funky smelling. You're not sure what the smell is but you hear what sounds like the word "cabbage" being mumbled but that's probably just an educated guess. You're handed what could be some indescribable meaty substance with something that looks like mashed potatoes, so its all white and chunky, but you know for a fact it ain't mashed potatoes. You eat one bite.

Its decision time.

That was the worst bite you've ever taken. Ever. You want to go home. They serve real food there. Have these people never heard of macaroni and cheese? Come on now! You are about to pack up and split when you look at the birthday boy's face. This hasn't been a top-notch party, but he's relatively content. I mean, come on its his birthday. How could he not enjoy it, but it still wasn't amazingly cool. You don't know him and although you know it wouldn't be a huge deal if you left you want to stick it out. You're going to do the right thing! You're going to make sure that you're the best person you can be! Today is about giving!!! Rock on!

The meal tastes like crap. You don't get to finish the Disney movie. He already has the gift you bought him. Its raining. Your mom is late picking you up and you're one of the last to leave after you've endured a long awkward child-adult talk sesh with the kid's parents about school. When you get home you go to bed early because the smell of the chinky white thing gave you a headache and three weeks later you discover that the blotchy kid you didn't know at the party had chicken pox so you might need to get a shot.

----

Today is about giving.

Tomorrow I'm sleeping in and only reading a topic if I've seen that Igg's replied to it already.

Ok: topic time.

You're girlfriend broke up with you so you could date her best friend. In my old middle school we had a word for that. Its called a hint.

If I translated your anecdote poorly please let me know.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 1:56 am 
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I'm confused.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 10:48 am 
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*chuckle*

As to the actual question, I'm not entirely sure what you're asking. Is this kind of like when you're 8 and you get married?


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 12:53 pm 
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Igg wrote:
*chuckle*

As to the actual question, I'm not entirely sure what you're asking. Is this kind of like when you're 8 and you get married?


Going along with Igg's question.. I almost afraid to know, but how old are you and your girlfriend(s), since I'm having trouble interpretting that paragraph?


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 1:04 pm 
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okay. i think i understand.
Girl A has inferiority complex, so dumped you to go out with girl B.
you got back together with girl A, but now you like girl B.
right?
to be blunt, its either A: you want what you cant have.
or B. you just want girl B.
ask yourself (reccuring dreams are often useful about now) if its A or B.

there ya go.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 5:01 pm 
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Setekh wrote:
okay. i think i understand.
Girl A has inferiority complex, so dumped you to go out with girl B.
you got back together with girl A, but now you like girl B.
right?
to be blunt, its either A: you want what you cant have.
or B. you just want girl B.
ask yourself (reccuring dreams are often useful about now) if its A or B.

there ya go.


Or write them both off as a loss, and go after a Girl C. It'd probably be for the best, and there are a lot of Girl C's out there.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 10:35 pm 
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Setekh wrote:
okay. i think i understand.
Girl A has inferiority complex, so dumped you to go out with B.
you got back together with A, but now you like B.
right?
to be blunt, its either A: you want what you cant have.
or B. you just want B.
ask yourself (reccuring dreams are often useful about now) if its A or B.

there ya go.
.. kinda... i guess.. Gurl (sorry i have to type it gurl but if i type it correctly it will come up just some spaces...) ok, gurl A likes me, gurl B likes me, there friends and im going out with gurl A, but so gurl A figures out gurl B likes me so gurl A dumps me so her friend can go out with me because she's nice like that... but anyway i like both the gurls now.... and im 15


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 2:09 am 
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Can we all stop ridiculing the boy and restrict ourselves to offering advice from now on please. Thanks awfully.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 11:23 pm 
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alien wrote:
Setekh wrote:
okay. i think i understand.
Girl A has inferiority complex, so dumped you to go out with B.
you got back together with A, but now you like B.
right?
to be blunt, its either A: you want what you cant have.
or B. you just want B.
ask yourself (reccuring dreams are often useful about now) if its A or B.

there ya go.
.. kinda... i guess.. Gurl (sorry i have to type it gurl but if i type it correctly it will come up just some spaces...) ok, gurl A likes me, gurl B likes me, there friends and im going out with gurl A, but so gurl A figures out gurl B likes me so gurl A dumps me so her friend can go out with me because she's nice like that... but anyway i like both the gurls now.... and im 15


Alien, wow this is quite something you've ended up in the middle of. And at 15! Goodness, I wasn't even allowed to date until I was 17 ... but that was a million years ago.

The bottom line is that you have come to the conclusion that you like both of these young ladies, correct? And that they are still friends?

To be honest, I really think you should take yourself out of the equation as far as dating either goes. If you think you can handle it and you think the girls can, you might want to have a sit down and tell them both that you do like them, but in the interest of everyone remaining friends and there being no hard feelings, jealousy, etc. that you will not date either of them. That you think the 3 of you should be friends, which can really be better and mean alot more in the long run.

Who knows what could happen in the future? If you're meant to be with one of them, then it will happen. But right now? I don't think it is a positive thing for any of you. Someone's going to end up being hurt, friendships will probably be broken, self-esteem (always a touchy thing no matter what age you are, trust me) will suffer.

The first girl (A) apparently already has some issues, or she would never have bowed out so her friend could go out with you. And I believe the second girl (B) has her own issues - or she would never have gone out with you knowing that her friend was! This is just too messy, and I fear it will end in tears and recriminations.

Best of luck in whatever you all decide!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Sep 01, 2005 12:11 am 
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Best option: Don't date either one of them. You WILL end up ruining their friendship, and any pair of girls that would pass a boy around like that and manipulate you to their own ends aren't girls you want to associate with. It seems the both of them are using you, and that isn't cool. 'Stay out of it' is the best advice I can give.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Sep 03, 2005 10:19 pm 
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Fiddelysquat wrote:
Best option: Don't date either one of them. You WILL end up ruining their friendship, and any pair of girls that would pass a boy around like that and manipulate you to their own ends aren't girls you want to associate with. It seems the both of them are using you, and that isn't cool. 'Stay out of it' is the best advice I can give.


What she said.
not being well versed with those of the female persussion myself ("im like a brother to them" or the oft heard, always hated "i love you, but i dont want to ruin our friendship" but i digress)
i can atleast say that i know manipulation when i see it.

ah ladies. cant live with em, cant understand anything they say half the time anyway.


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